The Tainted Heart

Somehow Im going to find the thing

The thing that'll erase the sting

The thing that's been bgging me ever since

The thing that kept me doing a lot of sins

The taint of my heart

Shall be torn apart

The black stain shall be removed

I not I shall disapprove

But I could use a hand

Or maybe a wand

But they wont even reprimand

Just a single aid

Just a little shade.

My heart is wrapped with electric wire

And been brought to the fire

Sometimes I want to stab it

To kill the darn halfwitt.

Watch me soar

I know nothing in this world is worth living for

I know my heart doesnt deserve a life

But why wont you stab it with a knife?

The Memoirs of the Nefarious Cradle (poem)

The world was moving
I can fell something
As I closed my eyes
I realized...
This place...
is for hearts that are chaste
For people who has no time to waste
Where all hearts and souls belong
Where we hear lots of songs
And to bear in mind
We have nothing to bind
We hve lots of friends
Who would commend
And who have lots of advices to sen
But not me
I dont live as free
I cant be who I want to be
I am vulnerable
While everyone's invincible
I am prisoned in an asylum
I have nothing to do but wait and face my doom
I have been oppressed
But no one guessed
In fact no one cares
They had their own share
SO I hid myself
Trying to hide like an elf
And so that no one would think I'm being sentimental
Cause I am not being emotional
But the pain...it's getting worser and worser
My life's insignificant to a roller coaster
For I am always down on my knees
While everyone's pleased
To see a pathetic child
Can't you just be mild?
I wanted to scream
But it's no use at all
It's not worth the fall
I am burning
I am freezing
But I have to Stood up
THe pain didn't stopped
It prolonged
So I sang a song
Trying to feel mirth
Which I never experienced since birth
But still I felt the sorrow
The pain that is coming tomorrow
It's not as easy as it seems
I need to scream
"I want to die!!!"
But I gave out a sigh
I had plenty of words
I felt like a nerd
But they're worthless
As if life was meaningless
I want to let the dark side out
That's why I want to shout
But there's still a glass that seals the dark side inside
I can't do this anymore
It haunts me just like before
So I went to the place full of ice
My brother heard my cries
It was written in his eyes
I asked for his help
He said I was a whelp
I looked for the warmth of his heart
And asked him to do his part
But his heart was frozen
That's why he was chosen
TO rule the ice
SO I suffered great sacrifice
And went home ashamed but unsurrised
To recieve my condemned prize

The next day I went to the clouds
I saw my crush laughing out loud
I went to him...his the only person I trust
But he poured many dusts
My shoes became full of dusts and he prepared to thrust
I saw needles from my heart, full of rust
I fell down to the land
No one caught me only the sand
A sharp stone hit my head
And trust me, it bled

The next day I went to the sea
To give all my pleas
I swam, holding my breath
Thinking, "this must be the feeling of death";
As I asked my mother for her aid
She suddenly d\started to fade
She took my breath
But She knew I cried with depth
She took it until I died
No one even cried
Instead they all sighed
For who could've loved a girl who tried
Who failed when she was still a child.
As I closed my eyes
I realized
This lace is only for thee
But not for me...

I drowned in the water

I fell a little bit further

My mom didnt even wondered

She jut let me wither

My ody was n a dark iche

I felt a little ick

Time kept on running

Watching my dead body wasnt stunning

After seconds of my death it looks like it never happened

Everybody did forget

But I cant forget about the painful regret

To see my forgotten body

Watching it I felt sorry

The past has been forgotten

But I could never forget what happened

And the thing that they did to me

I felt a little whore

Now I see...

Nothings worth living for...

Secrets of the Ocean

Seals, squids, planktons, seaturtles, whales, mollusks, seahorses, dolphins, fishes, shells, jellyfishes, narwhals, crabs, seaweeds and mantas are the orthodox sea creatures that we all know. But do know any sea serpents or other sea creatures which are very rare?

I'm pretty sure you knows mermaids, don't you? But we all know they dont exist, right? But we can never sure. There are only 2 things possible: one, maybe we can't see them because they're not human brings so they must've possessed some kind of extraordinary powers that not even our naked or aided eyes could see. Second, maybe they dont really exist.

I'm pretty sure you've heard of a long time ago monster that lives in the Loch Ness Ocean in Scottland, havent you? Reports have been said that many people have seen them and took pictures. It looked like a pleaseusaurus.

Next, there's the kraken. It is a sea serpent which was known long time ago in England, i think. It was so slender and has two horns.

Anyway, my point is, life can be an ocean. It has so many secret hidden . It is mysterious. We dont know if we are suppose to see it or not. Sometimes, the world accidentally ses it, sometimes the wanted to. That's why there are some parts of the ocean which we are not suppose to see. When I think about it, it gives me the creeps.

Afterlife

Have you ever felt what death is like? Well, do you want to know how it feels?

Being dead is just a normal stage in life. It's just the stage where you live in another world, where your soul is free.

People are just like lack candles with red bows. The black candle reppresents as their human bodies while the bow rpresent as their memories. Losing the bow means loing both life and memories. What I mean by life is the stage when one was still walking here in the earth.

Some says thst after death, there'll be life again but you'l not be the same person as you used to be. That's what they call the 'Circle of the Life'. You probably have heard that from the 'Land Before Times' and 'Lion King'.

The 'Circle of Life' is just like a food chain. First and foremost, you lived, then you died then you lived again and so on. For example, if you're name today is Mandy, you groew older and dies, next generation, you'll become another different person. You're not the old Mandy anymore, you'll become Mindy , a new form of person. But you'll never remember anything about Mandy. All you know is that you're Mindy. GOd knows who or what you'll become in the next life. He has your memories and then place another brain for you to complete. It's just like making a home video project.

But that's just what they said. I'm not telling it's true, it can be or it can't be.

Facing Our Teenage Life Crisis

Teenage was not as easy and as fun as it looks. You'll have to wander around, meeting all sorts of people and looking for a place to belong. You'll have to feel all of the emotions ; being hurt, happy, bored and a lot of things whether you like it or not. Especially when you see your crush (come on, let's face it), instead of being happy because you saw him, you'd rather be lonely since he doesn't know that you admire at him. He's like 'FOR YOUR EYES ONLY' and that's all. Several parents also says that their kids becomes contumacious when they reach their teens. They dont really acquise the rules of their parents (like me) . But maybe because it's their stage to rule and to have freedom. Some teenagers even tells their parents "If only you'd let me go out all the time, I'd be popular."

Most of the people loves being a teenager especially their high school life. True, it's outrageous but it can never be fun. One thing for me really rulez my world ; 'you don't hae to show your smelly laundry to the media.' You'll have to consider a "hush-hush sentiment" so that there'll be some other parts in your life which is still c;andestine. Anyway, in this kind of stage, you'll never believe in tooth fairies, leprechauns, sea serpents, witches, wizzads and santa paws (rawr) i-i mean santa claus. And each one is required with a reliable comrade (w/c you might not know, backstabs you).It could be a human, a bark of a tree or a notebook. It's up to you. But I prefer a notebook. First and foremost, humans are not reliable as you think. Some only. Second, it would be a little freaky if you'll talk to a bark. Third, you could just write down your secrets and read it until the day you die.

Giving Up The Last Breath

Life can be a roller coaster. Sometimes you're up, sometimes you're down. We embrace the outrageous moments and we ostracize the terrible ones.

Helerig Ame, my sweet friend, a 13 year old girl, once was a very cheerful type of person. Everytime you have a problem, she's always ready with some effective advices and jokes to cheer you up.

But then, a tragic event came, I saw her crying and asked her what her problem was. She denied to look at me.Then, she finally told me that she's been in a great despair ever since.

After that stupid incident, IU never really saw her blithe face anymore. Nor her contagious chuckles. She has become a changed person. She left her old self. She already started saying swearwords which she never knew how to speak when wewere still kids. She has already given up her awe-spiring memories...when she was still the sweetest rose ever.

The Computer That Ate My Brother

I used to have a big brother. He was good, intelligent, wise and thoughtful. Everytime he have a class to attend, he never leaves the house before I come with him. He's also a self-effacing person and never brags anything about himself. He was my brother and my bestfriend.

Sometimes, at night, we shared stories, secrets and lots of stuffs we could share. Even if our mum gives us chocolates each, he would give me his chocolate.

One day, he didn't waited for me to go to school, as usual. I felt somethings odd. I finally realized that he's gone. THe big brother I used to have is dead.

I saw him in his oom but he yelled at me. He said some stupid things at me. It was the first time ever he told me that I'm a pesky animal. I ran outside, to our secret place. I cried there and went back to my room.

I asked him where my brother was but he said he already killed him. But I didn't belived in him I knew it was the computer that ate him.

The Condemned Optimism

We've been trying to follow our dreams, studying hard and aiming as high as we could. But, what happens if you mistakenly told someone whom you think you can give him/her your trust but then, the next thing you knew, she let you down? Would you still pursue that dream or rue the day that you told that person? Here's my story...

I'm a very zealous girl. Yeah...I admit it. But on the other hand, it's not that bad to dream, isn't it?

I dreamed of becoming a ♪♥♥♪†ﮝ報報報ﮝ† and that's where I started my path through the wilderness... ♪

SO, I let my mum know about my dream and I told her that I'm really hoping that I could fulfill that darn ambition cause I found it really fun to be one. At first, she just nodded and said "yeah, yeah, cool" But then, she looke at me and then said, "You can never be like that because you're such a pig" I mean UGH...come on!!! she's suppose to be a mother and I think mothers should buoy up their kid's souls inreaching their goals. In fact, they should give exact advices and darn quotes for life in order for their kids to understand what they meant. But, my mum's different. She was totally opposite.

And then there's some of my lassmates who totally heard about this and then they frankly talked to me infront of everybody and told me "Listen, I don't think you could do that. Anyone could but not you."

At first, that didn't affected me. But in the end, I started to become very paranoid about it. So, the thoughts of being a nobody popped out from my head. I could even feel the great pain in my chest, technically. But all I could do is shut up.

I already told my bro about that but he let me down too. He said, "NO!NO! It's all your fault because you're blah...blahblah...blahblah...blahblah..."

Now, I'm totally frustrated. But still, I still planted in my mind that I needed to stand up and do my thing even if
I stand up alone. I don't think they think of me as a human. I think they think of me as a monster, but not literally. They said I inconsiderate. But the question was, were they considerate at me? I don't think so.